Bullsh*t Of The Day (BSOTD)

BSOTD is a thing that I just decided I'm going to do periodically. Just as a warning, if you're a very conservative right-wing republican, this post is probably going to be very offensive, so you'd better get your ass to church and cry to Jesus.

Today's bullshit is a little something called Anti-Same Sex Marriage.
If you oppose same sex marriage, I automatically hate you. Now, I'm not talking about religious people who keep to themselves about their beliefs about the definition of marriage. I live in Utah, which is one of the world's centers of bigotry, and let me tell you as the most liberal, open-minded atheist in the world; some people who believe marriage is between a man and a woman are very nice people. I've met quite a few since I've moved here, and as long as they love everyone and keep their beliefs to themselves instead of holding back the progression of our society, everything's cool. These are not the people I'm talking about when I say "people who oppose same sex marriage". 

When I say "people who oppose same sex marriage" or anything related to that, I'm talking about one of the world's most accurate stereotypes. I'm talking about middle-aged white Christians who honestly believe that two human beings in love are going to spark God's PMS and the world will surely plunge into a hellish apocalypse all because a lady and another lady put a ring on it, or because a dude and a dude kissed each other goodnight.

Let's disprove some bigots' beliefs, shall we?

So what you're getting at is that single mothers and fathers are going to raise malfunctioning kids. Therefor, if a man leaves his wife or if a wife leaves her husband or if one of the parents of the child dies, we should automatically take away the child and give it to a married, straight couple, because that is the only way a child will be able to survive in the world.

Yeah, you're right. Unless the two men love each other and are spouses.

Unless all homosexuals work for Target, my bullshit meter is off the charts.

OH GOD! TWO HUMANS, BOTH WITH VAGINAS, ARE IN LOVE! SWEET CHRIST! AND THEY'RE MARRIED? DOES THIS MEAN THEY'RE GONNA RUB THEIR VAGINAS TOGETHER? I DON'T APPROVE OF THAT BECAUSE IT IS DIRECTLY AFFECTING MY LIFE! THE WORLD IS ENDING! CALL THE GOVERNMENT!

You are entirely correct, my dear fellow human. And that has absolutely nothing to do with love.

See, this is what really pisses me off. People are getting love and reproduction completely mixed up. You might as well say that infertile couples should be banned too, because they can't make their own babies.

Oh, sweet glob. Where do I start with this one?

-love is not immoral.

-love is beautiful and completely necessary. 

-you need to invest in an imbecile-to-english dictionary.

You got it. Kids, you were all made by a penis and a vagina. Sex Ed class dismissed. But seriously lady, kids don't know how babies are made in the first place, and they also don't give a damn. They all still believe in cooties, for glob's sake.

If you think that same sex marriage is immoral but killing people is not, then I got news for you; you, my friend, are completely fucking insane.

................................What?

Look, people who don't like same sex marriage; you are basing this off a book that was written thousands of years ago. This is the same book that says "God" will punish you if you eat shrimp, wear clothing of more than one fabric, and most importantly, says to love everybody. I'm not religious, I don't believe in a higher power of any sort. However, if I did, I sure as hell wouldn't worship one that punishes love. That's what marriage is. Love. Marriage is between two consenting human beings who love each other so much that they have decided to commit themselves specifically to that other human being for the rest of their life.

So please, shut the fuck up, same sex marriage opposing dipshits.