SO EXCITED OMFGFPHIQRBFGIOQR376EFGUOEH

HEY
YOU
PERSON
DO YOU SEE THIS FACE
THIS FACE RIGHT HERE

THAT FACE
WHICH HAPPENS TO BELONG TO ME
IS GONNA BE UP HERE IN LIKE TWO MONTHS

SO EXCITED
SO VERY EXCITED

IMAGINE IT

Okay. Let me explain.

As I'm sure is relatively well known, I am a pretty dedicated musician. I've been playing piano since I was about six and I also play a succession of other instruments, although piano is my main bitch. Recently, I've been getting over my crippling, vomit-inducing fear of singing in front of any other organism with the ability to hear sounds. So far, it's been going pretty well, and apparently I have a pretty decent voice. So, around a month ago, I heard about this cool little thing called Music Garage. It actually sounded kinda lame at first, because I only heard the radio ad for it. However, my dad was all like OMFG YOU GOTTA GO AND DO THAT SHIT, so I went and did that shit.

After we got home, my dad went and emailed the main dude at Music Garage. I didn't really do anything, because I wasn't that into it. I mean, I had no idea what it was anyway, so naturally, I was not able to give a damn. My dad soon told me that I'd be having an audition for Music Garage the following thursday. At first, I was kinda not very excited. My logic was that it would've been like an audition to be in a classical piano recital; those are the only kinds of auditions I'd ever been to. I thought I was gonna have to sit down at the piano and play them something all by myself while there were nasty judges, you know, judging me.

It was not like that at all.

The Music Garage was basically just a studio. The only real lights were colorful spot lights facing a little stage. The walls, floors, and ceilings were all black, there were posters all over the walls, and all that nice stuff. There was nothing professional about it. It was AWESOME. 

For the audition, all the other kids were in the back of the room eating pizza and casually talking. The only people who were "judging" were the directors of the thing. One of them was this big dude who was just standing there jamming, and the other was this skinny tall dude with really long hair who was also standing there just kinda headbanging. I had to play keyboards and sing, with a band. I guess I did pretty well, because I got chosen to be in the core band.

Essentially, shit tons of people auditioned, just to be in normal Music Garage. It was also pretty much an audition to be in the core band for Mountain Town Music. The core band is this thing that Mountain Town Music was paying Music Garage to organize. Basically, they wanted a band that could perform all around the Park City/Salt Lake City area. They wanted really good rock band, all teens, of four or five people; and they're paying a thousand dollars per kid in the band. I GOT CHOSEN TO BE THE LEAD VOCALIST AND KEYBOARD PERSON. I NOW HAVE A NET WORTH OF AT LEAST ONE THOUSAND DOLLARS. 

This, my friends, is also technically a scholarship. To be in regular Music Garage, if you make it in, you still have to pay a shit ton of money. But, because I'm in the core band, I'm being paid for. And I get to be in a badass band. I may be the only girl in the band, but I'm super good friends with all the other dudes in it, so I can't wait.

We've already been scheduled to play at like twelve different concerts and venues over the summer, one of them being Deer Valley Ski Resort. So, if you ever feel the need to go to one of their free concerts over the summer, I'm gonna be there, and I encourage you to throw food at us while we're playing. That's always been a dream of mine.

My life of vocals

I started attempting to be a singer at the tender age of about, I don't know, three and a half seconds old. I think I was pretty good. I could definitely have been a death metal vocalist at that age, but I seem to have lost my touch.

Just kidding. But seriously, I think every single girl out there dreamed of being a music star at some age, usually pretty early on. My earliest memory of wanting to be a singer was at my 5th birthday party.  I had it at Sharkey's kids hair salon in Westport Connecticut and it was fabulous as fuck. I mean, I knew I was fabulous from the time I knew how to say the word "glitter." I took the liberty of going onto google images to find some pictures of the place. So many glittery, fabulous memories.

I mean, this was top-notch fabulosity. This was a hair cutting place. Now you can have an idea of what a glamorous child I was, not to mention how badly my mom wanted me to be one of those child pageant queens. ANYWAY, at this "glamour girl" party, after we ate fabulous cake and dressed in fabulous clothes, we had a fabulous kareoke session. That's the day I realized that I was completely, horrifically tone deaf. As a fresh, new five year old who didn't really know shit about music and half the time still slept in pull-ups, this didn't bother me in the least. However, as the years went on, I began to care more and more about my singing voice.

After many years of practicing my singing (in private), I stopped being entirely tone deaf. However, I couldn't exactly hit the notes very easily. I'd know exactly what note to hit, but my voice just didn't want to hit it. I also could not for the life of me do that fancy WOOOoooOOOOOooOOOO hitting-tons-of-different-notes-within-two-seconds-without-taking-a-breath thing. I was okay, but I also kinda sucked. I tried really hard to do all those fancy things with my voice, but to no avail. Instead, my life was kinda just like;

Until I was about twelve, that is. I got kinda good that year. I still couldn't do that fancy WOOOooooOWOOOOOOO thing that I mentioned earlier, but I had hit puberty. That meant that my voice was a lot richer and deeper and it just sounded nicer. It also meant that I had awkward boob nubbies and acne on absolutely everything. Let's not dwell on that though. 

Okay. We can dwell on it a little bit. 

Ha, haha, ha. Oh god. 

Anyway, then 8th grade happened. I say this because I have no explanation as to why the hell I suddenly got really, really good at vocals, so the only way I can say what happened is, "8th grade happened." I finally was able to do that WOOOooooooOOOOOOooooOOOOOOOOO thing. I learned how to scream, kinda. I don't think I'll ever be able to do a death metal growl, only because I'm a lady and my voice can only go so deep. I really do wish I was able to, though. Then I could go in public and scare the actual fuck out of everybody who passes by me. I'd be all like, lol I'm just a tiny little 5'2 teenager girl and people would be like lol I'm just walkin past this tiny little teenager girl and I'd be all like hello random pedestrian nothing unusual here I'm just a polite little teenager girl and they'd be all like hello little teenager girl and then I'd be all like FUCKING DEATH I'LL MURDER YOUR FAMILY WITH MY FAT BLACK DICK UP YOUR BELLYBUTTON AFTER I DINE ON UNBORN FETUSES WITH UNICORN BLOOD AS BARBECUE SAUCE

Anywho, I guess I'm also the lead vocalist in a band now. I'm pretty happy about that, because I'll get to be all musical with some of my besties and that'll be fun. I mean, as long as I don't have to do death metal growls.

Jon Batiste: the best musical experience of my life

Okay.

An amazing thing took place today.

Jon Batiste and his jazz band Stay Human visited our school to kinda hang out and be musical with us band/orchestra kids. It was optional wether or not we went, and for a while, I considered not going. Let me tell you something honey; had I not gone, my life would not be the same.

 They had a few kids up on the stage with them; two drummers, a sax, a bass, and a piano. I was that piano.

It was amazing.

For an hour and a half, we all played and improvised and soon every kid was up with their instrument and we were all playing and I am so happy oh my god. I swear I've been having a musical orgasm for five and a half hours straight.

This is Jon:

 (and Stay Human, they're all awesome too)

First of all, Jon Batiste is the most awesome person I've ever met. He's freaking adorable. I don't mean that in a romantic way, I mean it in that his smile and positive attitude are both contagious. He's like if Jesus and Jimi Hendrix had a baby. 

He's also ridiculously talented. He can ear play like me and he can play any genre and he's just awesome. He's the kind of person who supports everyone with anything they do, no matter the skill level. In fact, the entire band was just super cool and welcoming. 

Again; a Jesus and Jimi Hendrix love child. He's my new favorite person, and it was an honor to be with him.

Also, after playing piano with everyone, I was approached by my awesome band teacher. I was then asked by him to be in jazz band, so that was amazingly exciting, because you aren't usually requested to join jazz band.  THEN, I was approached by the ORCHESTRA teacher, who asked be to be the pianist for the orchestra. After telling him that I was planning on doing both wind ensemble and jazz band, he told me that it was ok, and that I could just jump in during any orchestra rehearsal when I have time and start playing piano with the orchestra. Do you know how much that means to me? TODAY HAS BEEN A GOOD DAY.

How I started playing music

If you've been reading my blog for a while, or have just recently been stalking my every post, you will know that I am a musician. A rather dedicated one, at that. I play piano, guitar, drums, and I sing. At least 5 hours of my weekdays are consumed entirely by me playing/writing music. Weekends is basically just entirely music. I have a standup piano in my room, right next to my bed, so I hardly even have to wake up in order to start playing. That's what happens when you're lazy as fuck.

But how did I get to this state?

I've always loved music. My first memories with a piano are from when I was a toddler, probably no older than 3. I would go over to my grandparent's house in Stamford, Connecticut, just a minute or two away from our apartment. I basically grew up in and absolutely adored that house, which was a giant modern open floor plan shaped like an octagon, with high ceilings and skylights and windows making up most of it. They had a big white piano up against the wall and I would ask my Poppop to play a song while I danced around the giant room. Then I'd violently kick him off the piano bench and started banging on the keys with my chubby 3 year old hands, then start screaming about how the piano is rigged so only he can make it sound pretty. 3 year old logic. 

I FOUND PICTURES OF THE HOUSE ON THE INTERNET.

There's the piano, against the wall on the right.

So until I was about six, the only musical thing I did was bang on that piano awkwardly, making little tunes. Then, when I was six, my grandparents held a concert in their house for a russian string quartet that they were friends with. Shit tons of people were there, including my Poppop's friend Genevieve, a super accomplished world renowned pianist. I was six when the concert happened, and some of my cousins were also there. 

Apparently, my Poppop had asked Genevieve beforehand to give me piano lessons, and she said no, as she only mentors teenagers who already have a pretty advanced understanding/skill level with piano. 

Basically, in a nutshell, this is what happened:

Genevieve says she won't teach me

Concert happens

Genevieve goes to concert

I go to concert with cousins

Concert is in the middle of happening

Cousins are being loud and obnoxious 

I am sitting there quietly and nicely listening to the quartet

Genevieve sees me sitting and listening all nice and realizes that I don't totally suck and that I like music so she decides to teach me the piano-ness

To this day, I know how beautiful the music that string quartet can make is, but at the time of the concert I think I was half asleep, which is why I appeared so quiet and well-mannered. Oh well. I had them all completely tricked into thinking I was a sweet and perfect little child, and it did me pretty damn well. I like to think that I really was a sweet little girl and that I deserved those piano lessons, but I know in my heart I was a 60 pound psychopathic ball of manipulative fury. 

I had my first lesson with Genevieve right in the middle of the summer of when I was going into 3rd grade. I remember the first song she ever attempted to teach me. It was all single notes, just the right hand, only one bar. She explained to me in great detail how notes work and everything. The first words I said after she explained all this shit for about 10 minutes was...........can you guess?

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

"I don't get it."

Over the years that I studied with Genevieve, I still never ended up getting it. Genevieve, I am convinced, is the best piano teacher ever, but reading music is something I have never been able to do and I'm damn sure it will always stay that way.

But yeah, I can't read music. Genevieve attempted to jam the skill into my brain for six fucking years. SIX YEARS. AT THE TIME, THAT WAS HALF MY LIFE. I have no idea what it is with me, but I can't read music to save my life. What I can do is ear play and memorize like a freaking boss. And that, my friends, is a skill that nobody ever taught me. It just came up one day. I actually tried to surpress it for quite a while, because I thought it was some alien in my brain controlling my fingers. But basically, instead of reading music (which, for me, is like trying to successfully have a conversation with my toenail), I listen to what I want to learn, and then I play it back. Memorization, for me, takes about 5 minutes for a song that's several pages long. I don't know what's up with my brain, because I can't memorize anything else like that. I can't remember what pants I'm wearing right now.

I eventually stopped working with Genevieve in classical music when I was twelve. I realized that with my weird ear playing/memorizing thing, I wanted to work on other instruments and styles of music by myself.

That's basically how the whole music thing happened for me. Right after I stopped working with her, I took up drums and guitar. Again, I ear play, so I taught myself all those things. Now its completely taken over my life, and I regret nothing. I'm slightly psychotic, and music helps me calm the fuck down. So yeah. I like music. A lot.

My very favorite bands

I've decided to come back almost a year after I originally posted this to edit it and make it less stupid.

I listen mostly to grunge, progressive death metal, alternative rock, hard rock, melodic death metal, and some black metal when I'm feeling norwegian.
These are the bands I listen to the mostest.

Children of Bodom 

(death metal)

 Seether
(my all time favorite band) 
(nu metal/hard rock/grunge)

Meshuggah 

(progressive death metal)

Morbid Angel 

(death metal)

Alter Bridge 

(hard rock)

Pink Floyd 

(60's rock/psychedelic rock)

Billy Talent 

(punk)

Motionless in White 

(screamo)

Darkthrone 

(black metal)

Cannibal Corpse 

(death metal)

Jimi Hendrix 

(this is just his signature, that guy didn't even need a logo) 

(If you don't know what genre Jimi Hendrix is then you need to look in the mirror, stare into your own reflection, and tell yourself what a horrible person you are)

The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus 

(post-hardcore)

A Day to Remember 

(screamo/pop-punk)

Green Day 

(punk)

Rise Against 

(punk)

Nirvana 

(grunge)

Decapitated 

(progressive death metal)

Gorgoroth 

(black metal)

Slipknot 

(nu metal/progressive death metal)

Chelsea Grin 

(progressive death metal)

Type O Negative

(hard rock)

Nocturnal Depression

(black metal/doom metal)

Red Hot Chili Peppers

(alternative rock or whatever I don't really know)

Weezer

(90's alternative rock or something)

Radiohead

(alternative rock/soft rock/weird ass independent rock)